


Buried Beneath

by Laugh_at_the_girl_who_loves_too_easily



Category: Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Awkwardness, Blood, Child Abuse, Hand Jobs, M/M, Shower Sex, Violence, mention of past suicide attempts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-02
Updated: 2013-06-16
Packaged: 2017-12-07 05:49:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/745001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laugh_at_the_girl_who_loves_too_easily/pseuds/Laugh_at_the_girl_who_loves_too_easily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Can Daryl keep his feeling buried under the surface or will they be forced to appear?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Not particularly canon but some bits are i guess so it's not really an AU ~  
> hope you enjoy it.

As I pushed him up against the hard wall I expected him to push me back to shove me away and shout at me ,he didn’t , he even let me cover his mouth with my calloused hand without argument. My forehead was touching his as we hid in a quiet confided space. The only noise we could hear was the moans and gurgles of those stupid fucking walkers. His eyes never lost contact with mine. Not once. Not until I started to feel awkward and averted my eyes to look at where the walkers were.  
There was a stray away from the heard. It was haunting how much I felt a connection towards him, a fucking walking corpse that can’t even think for itself. I never did fit in anywhere. Not even at home. Always an outcast and I never understood that. Now Rick...at first I didn’t think he would accept me no one else had but he did, he even made me his right hand man. Maybe even enjoys my company. 

Swiftly and silently I grasped my hunting knife in my right hand and dug it into the stray walkers head killing it with little noise or struggle coming from it. Just how I will go.  
“What ya did in the city, after Merle...will it work ‘gain?” I pondered my eyes locking back with his. Never was much of a talker, Dad made sure of that. Merle he always wanted me to fight and a stand up for what I want but with both conflicting views I did what one said around them but not when I was around the other. You don't know what that does to a person.  
Rick just nodded not saying a word as I drove my hunting knife into its stomach tearing the flesh open. A stench of rotting flesh hit both of our noses in an instant, I wanted to puke and I could see that Rick was trying his damn hardest not to gag. Unlike last time we didn’t have other clothes we could wear and discard later. Hygiene went out the window when the apocalypse came. Yet I’m not letting either of us change , so I checked for any cuts on my skin that may make contact with the blood , Rick stared at me with a raised eyebrow before he figured out what I was doing and copied. The way he moves now is so much different from when I first met him I think it’s finally taking a toll on him. Naturally. Death does that to a person and an apocalypse doesn’t help.  
I helped place an intestine over his shoulders as he wiped blood all over himself, when we were finished covering him, we were both nearly throwing up but we struggled through to get me to smell as bad as he did. And then we slumped slowly past the heard of zombies trying our hardest not to knock them or attract too much attention. Rick looked like he was holding his breath. I kept praying it wouldn’t rain like it did last time.  
It had to have been the longest five minutes of my life when we finally got furthest away from the heard to start walking a bit faster with our bags in hand. Rick still looked like he was going to gag , I didn’t really want to take my eyes off of him in case he fainted but suddenly a car alarm was set off nearby us, about ten feet away.  
I don't think I felt the slightest fear then. But I felt something, and it caused the hair to rise on the backs of my arms. The countryside for all its vastness seemed empty. I readied my crossbow. Some vague thought came to me that I had better get out of the open field and into the woods and hurry with Rick. 

We didn’t stop running until all we could hear was our own heavy breathing and the wind blowing through the vast amount of trees. Nearby there was a water source I could hear it, I’m not sure if Rick could because he wasn’t trained to be a hunter or tracker. Not like I was going to ask.  
He was huddled over his hands on his knees as he gasped for air. He was physically fit as a police officer should be and considering you have to be in a zombie apocalypse, survival of the fittest and all that, but he never had physiotherapy after his coma. That must affect something , I'm not a doctor so what do I know.  
Obviously I was out of breath too but I didn't show it as much. I started towards where I believed the water source to be with Rick following clumsily and hastefully behind me crushing many branches and pebbles under his boots. He’d never been so graceless, something must be wrong. 

It was quite beautiful, the running water that trickled down the rocks into a dark blue lagoon. Not a walker in site. Or any blood for that matter. A little bit of haven within the storm. 

"Oh thank the lord " Rick exclaimed before he walked over to the surprisingly clean water , got down on to his knees and scooped some water out with hands bringing it to his chapped lips to drink. Little bit dribbled in between his fingers before he just uncupped his hands letting it splash over his blood covered clothes. Rick began to unbutton his shirt then he undid his belt and the metal button of his trousers. He placed his gun where it wouldn’t get wet also with his knife and the bag.

I would be lying and sweating like a whore at church if I didn't say I was aroused by this. 

The well built rugged man dropped his blood filled clothes into the body of water, before he looked back at me with raised eyebrows. 

"You gonna wash your clothes before it sinks into your skin?" He chuckled as he noticed my blush and where my eyes may have been looking before. I nodded flustered as I walked over to where he was scrubbing his clothes. I watched as the once blueish water turned a pinky red where we were washing our clothes. 

Just when I thought things couldn't get worse Rick stripped out of his boxers after he pulled his soaking wet but vaguely clean clothes out of the water and left them on a rock that had the only ray of sunlight shining on in from the tree canopy to dry before he jumped into the water. Stark naked. 

I'm a hell of a strong willed person to keep my eyes on washing my clothes than at the Sheriff. The naked, hot , Sheriff. Who was recently widowed. And straight. Daryl grow a heart...and a brain. I had been scrubbing the clothes too long now because my hands had turned pink from the blood so I left them with Rick's clothes before I sat down on the rock next to it.  
"Daryl, you stink ,just like I did. Please wash." Rick begged with comedic eyes. Dick. I rolled my eyes then walked over to the water edge to strip out of my boxers and jump into the water quickly enough so he didn't see anything. I had to face away from him. There wasn’t much choice in it now as I didn’t have clothes to hide my arousal. What? It’s been a while since I could have some me alone time.  
I could feel his eyes scouring my back and I wish I could have hid it but I was in the water now and my clothes were drying on the bank, it was too late for me to go under the water the damage was already done.  
"Daryl...who did that to you? Was it Merle" He asked with his ultimate caring voice. God it killed me inside. I heard the water sloshing as he moved towards my back; I made a move to get away. To leave. Yet his hand grabbed my shoulder over my black demons tattoo as his other hand traced the different aged scars along my back, starting from my left shoulder to my right and then down my spine to the small of my back. His touch made me shiver. Gasp. He was so gently ... I never thought a man could be gentle. I was taught not to be gentle. Slowly, a rosy scarlet colour spread over my cheeks, making my face take on an almost childlike appearance. I dropped my head in embarrassment. That a simple chaste touch could make my mouth shape like an O.  
"Dad...Will did." I mumbled by accent stranger than usual because even though I am ashamed to admit it my arousal. He wrapped his arms around my waist and leant his head against my shoulder blades as he hugged me from behind, his bare chest pressed against me.

"Mom left when I was five, let's just say Will...he wasn't much of a father. The scars on my back say that good and well." I didn't mention how Mom died in a house fire after she came back a year later , didn't mention how it was her fault or how I would of killed her if her chain smoking didn't. "Merle is sad he's gone but I'm not...never once not even when Jess shot him in the head." How could I give Dad mercy when he never gave me any?

It was weird. I didn't know how to react at all. He wanted to comfort me I guess but surely we should be keeping an eye out for walkers? Yet his hot breathe just skimmed over my back as his eyelashes fluttered tickling me slightly. It was comforting. And nice. But this wasn't the place or the time.

"Rick, shouldn't we be getting back?" I stuttered embarrassed to break the silence. He knew I was right, we were soon to be in a war, that's why we were wandering in the first place to get supplies and guns. We were successful, just nearly died is all. Yet in all of it we were able to find a peaceful bonding moment? 

Strange. 

We both acted like nothing happened as we made the trek back to the Prison. There seemed to be less Zombies this time, we only had to jog to get away from them. My hand kept drifting near Rick's which was resting on his gun in his leg holder. 

Rick's face is kind. There's a gentleness in his expression and the lines around his mouth, deep crevices , suggest he liked to laugh. So different from me. Believe it or not I tried to kill myself when I was a teenager. I would have succeeded too if I didn't do it in a school but I had nowhere else to do it. Apparently the only sacred place to kill myself was in the school boys bathroom in a cubicle that was scrawled with graffiti and broken things. Mirrors smashed hardly any running water. Pathetic.  
I wrote in my own blood on the cubicle walls after I had slashed my wrists deeply that the blood covered my hands and slowly sunk into my white tank top. Things about life being torture and me being a failure. And when I started to drift out of consciousness, I heard the bathroom door squeak open and all I heard was a faint male scream as everything turned black.  
Then I woke up in a hospital. Nothing special really just a big fucking disaster. Merle doesn’t know this, I mean he only recently found out Will beat me, so he is not exactly a grade A student in that department. Probably never will be. Will only came to the hospital once, hit me so hard the bruise turned a yellow purple and then he never came again, had to lie to the nurse and doctors saying I fell or some shit like that.  
As we came into the prison, Merle was sat away from everyone else messing with his metal arm piece not caring about anyone else. Has he ever? Survival is the game. Whatever they want to do they can do, and whatever happens because of it is their own fault. That’s Merle’s attitude. I guess it’s reasonable; hope is slipping through my hands if I’m honest. But we need people to survive.  
So I’ll try my best to get him to co-exist. Especially with Rick...they are both family. But Merle needs to apologize to Maggie and Glenn.  
I stormed over to his table placing my crossbow next to where he was sat.  
“Merle, you need to apologize” I demanded loudly enough that he knew I meant it but not loud enough that the rest could hear I was forcing him to apologize. He eyes darted up to scowl at me. My nose scrunched in anger that he would look at me like that. I was asking a simple request.  
“Why the fuck will I do that, Princess?” He snorted before he stood up and shoved me.  
“’Cause you owe me” I spat, standing my ground. I noticed people started to pay attention and Rick looked about ready to step in as well as Glenn, I think he’ll take any chance he can get to punch Merle. I just don’t want to give him one, I know Merle’s a dick a lot of the time but he is my brother and I just want people to co-exist.  
“You owe me, boy! I’ve saved your unforgiving ass a million times and you and your cock sucking sheriff left me” He growled at me now gripping my clothing tightly and picking me off the ground. There were a lot of gasps because of his language and Carl looked ready to shoot Merle for abusing his dad ...is it really that shocking? That’s hardly bad considering! Rick’s face contorted into something of anger.  
“You left me first you Asshole. I was more vulnerable and you knew it! Grow the fuck up and grow some balls and thank these people for even letting your violent ass back in” I shouted through gritted teeth as I pushed him off of me and walked at a fast pace away from him before he would hit me. I wondered off with my crossbow that I had swiped off the table towards the shower area nearest to the block that was cleared out and vaguely safe. He is such an ignorant bitch!  
I leant my head against the dirty cold tiles just breathing trying not to get too angry when I heard a footstep behind me. I swung around with my hunter knife in my hand. Rick. Just Rick...no threat. Yet.  
“Sorry ‘bout Merle...I know you didn’t want him here in the first place and thanks for letting him for me” I mumbled an apology my eyes now directed at my feet. His hand met my shoulder and gave it a squeeze causing me to look up; he just answered me with a smile.

 

... 

 

Awkward would be an understatement. Standing in a communal shower naked under the spray of quite cold water with another man right by your side is not an experience I am used to. I never had time to you know...get down with anyone. The apocalypse broke out about a year ago and before that who would fuck a redneck as ugly as me? I wasn’t going to pay for it! So instead I’m a 30 something year old virgin. Yippee. And now I’m ‘showering’ with Rick whom is standing incredible close considering how much room there is. My eyes traced slowly up his soaped body from his feet to his hips where some suds gathered then to his stubbly face suddenly my eyes met with his. He watched me. He saw me checking him out. Fuck. My face turned way hotter than the water and as red as tomato, I turned away from him as fast as I could attempting to leave just like at the lagoon. I wanted to disappear. Yet he pushed me quite roughly against the tiled wall, under the spray of water even more. I waited the inevitable punch...that never came, instead his lips met mine in a teeth crushing embrace. Rick’s hands went from my shoulders down to my hips as he tongue pried my mouth open.  
I didn’t know what to do, I felt like I was drowning. It felt so amazingly awesome I was melting inside but was it real? Did he really care? And does that even matter anymore when the world has gone to shit?  
And now this. Now everything moves again in slick motion, Rick's hand wrapped around my cock, stroking me fast and sure, and thigh still rubbing at my balls. I placed my hand on Rick, matching his rhythm, each stroke sending shivers the length of a spine, shooting out and overlapping until each nerve ending is quivering tension. My head was thrown back, lips parted; sweat prickling the hollow of my neck. My orgasm took me by surprise, it ripped through me with such a power that my whole body jerked backwards and my thigh pressed up hard against Rick.  
Gasping, Panting. I needed air. I was suffocating. It was like ecstasy but that doesn’t make it right. Fuck he was recently widowed. You’ll be the death of me Rick.  
He bit into my shoulder as he dry humped against me, my own cum spread over his stomach and mine. Thank the lord for being under the spray of the shower. I brought Rick off as he still moved against me slickly; he bit down even harder before he moaned out loudly his load now all over my hand. His teeth marks would defiantly be there for a while as he drew some blood.  
My blush was much worse than before, I think I could die from the embarrassment. I waited a short moment letting the water wash over me getting rid of all the mess, before I grabbed my clothes and ran in the different direction away from him and everyone else. He tried to grab me but I don’t truly think he tried hard enough.  
I just sat where I had found Carol before, I was now clothed with my knees up to my chest as the tears streamed down my face. God, I’m so weak. Crying over a quick mess-around. I guess its cause I know he doesn’t love me I’m just a shoulder to cry on and a quick fuck because he is lonely and yet I would die for him. I didn’t love him to begin with and he defiantly didn’t like me. But our eyes kept connecting and there were moments where there was no one else. For me anyway. He is the only other person apart from Merle who ever cared for me. Who knows if Rick was looking for me.  
Without warning I heard many footsteps outside the door. There sounded like there were so many walkers. Once again I prayed that wouldn’t notice me nevertheless they did.  
I was pivoting, thrusting, struggling back, and almost falling to my knees. Probably it was  
no more than fifteen minutes that this went on. But there is no measuring time like that. When things with no conscious are trying to kill you. And with my legs giving out, I made one last desperate gamble. I stood stock-still, weapons at my sides. And they came in for the kill this time just as I hoped they would. I stabbed one in eye with a crossbow arrow and thrusted a knife threw another ones neck but there was still about six left and I just knew I was done for. It’s hilarious I wasn’t going to die this easy. With a strong kick I pushed one of them back stumbling into the group to give myself some room to run, they followed as I ran down the small metal corridors until ironically I tripped and hit my head as I fell, they slowly closed in on me. The end is near I think as I close my eyes. 

But then all I hear is three gun shots, a knife going through two of their skulls and then another gunshot. 

My eyes burst open even if my vision was blackening and blurred I could make out that face anywhere. Rick. Once again my saviour. Fucking dick. He picked me up with little struggle before he carried me back to the others and placed me on my bed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There may or may not be another chapter an epilogue depending on how well this goes.   
> Hope you enjoy it <3

[i/When his eyes finally opened properly and steadied he scrambled to get up in a sitting position. His eyes darted across the room, he was incredibly nervous. I guess it didn’t help that a few moments ago many people were surrounding him in a very very tiny confided cell that really isn’t the nicest place we have been in these past months but safety is much more important that comfort now. /i]

 

Am I surprised that Rick noticed my scars on my wrist when he was treating my head wound? No, if anything I'm surprised he didn't noticed them sooner it’s not like I hide them. I tried to kill myself woop di do, we have all thought about it, I was just numb enough to try it. And it’s not like when I tried to kill myself in the bathroom that it was the first time I had cut myself. Hell no. I kept experimenting until I knew the perfect way I wanted to do it.   
I'm also pretty certain that this wasn't the first time Rick had ever seen someone who had cut because when you work with the police its quite a common occurrence since you know it’s illegal to kill yourself. What. A. Stupid. Law. Its fucking pathetic it’s my life you dipshits. Stop being a controlling know it all.   
Rick just stared at me with those concerning eyes he has. It was so hard to look him in the eyes since...what we did; all I see is his orgasm face. What a face. I feel like I've cheated with him it’s not like I have or anything but as good as it felt it just felt wrong in the back of my mind and I think that's because we didn't say anything. I feel like a whore or something.   
"Look Daryl, are you alright?...you need to be careful , not so reckless. I'm sorry if I upset or if it was Merle however we need-all of us need to watch out for each other so we don't lose anyone and more than anyone else in the group if I don't have you.... “Rick sighed heavily before he squeezed my hand and walked away to the rest of the group leaving me alone in my cell stewing in an emotion I couldn't quite place. 

Wasn't quite sure if I should of gone to sleep or not with a concussion but I didn't care enough to ask the old man. I just let my eyes drift close as I feel into what felt was going to be the best and deepest slumber I have had since the apocalypse.  
The first slash didn't actually hurt the most it was probably by the tenth where it hurt the most before it died down to numbness. I began to struggle nearing what I think was the seventeenth. I struggled enough that I rolled onto my bleeding back, probably staining my white bed sheets. That annoyed my father greatly that without a second thought he lashed his belt in my direction not caring where it struck. Unfortunately it hit my face, right across my eye causing me to wail out in pain as the warm substance ran down my cheek. It wouldn't matter that it would bruise or scar because I'm a ‘stupid redneck’ who is destined to follow the path of my older brother, they would think I got in a fight with some kid first before they would blame my father. 

Why couldn't I wake up? Let me wake up! I mentally screamed as Will hits me harder with his belt and I have to use my hands as a shield. They were becoming covered in blood and welts when I used what strength I could muster up to kick him in the crotch so I could run out of my bedroom and towards the stairs. That's where it turns black and the next time I open my eyes I'm at the bottom of the rickety broken stairs with my arm and leg possibly broken. Yet Will still finds it to be a good idea to stamp on my face crushing my nose. There's a sickening crunch and I cry loud enough I'm sure the next town over would have heard. That was the first time I felt close to death but defiantly not the last. With my bloody hands I had tried to fight for the pride I had left in me. I failed. 

Squinting, twitching and panting back into the present time hurt like a bitch and was not the way I wanted to wake up. Nor the way I wanted to sleep. My sheets were covered in sweat sticking to me as I moved, it was disgusting. With a roll of my eyes I shrugged off of the prison bed I had named my own and took a quick look at myself in the crack mirror that was in the cell, the lines etched into my face were from these type of dreams and Merle. With a sigh I slinked into the mess hall where the others were including Merle. He snickered at me when he saw me limping as my legs still hurt from fighting off the zombies earlier. In the times of an apocalypse you forget how much you use your legs and how you are on them all the time. I was fed up of him already, so I was going to knock him down some pegs. 

“Ya think you are so high ‘n mighty don’t ya?” I bellowed at him striding towards him. I never thought I would argue so much with him in such a short amount of time. He opened his mouth but I began talking again before he could say anything. “Shut ya filthy mouth! I came back for you .TWICE. Stop being a dick and be grateful I ... no... They didn’t leave with the Governor so he could kill ya.” 

“Ya are no better than me princess. Have you told them ‘bout how we planned to rob them the day I got left?” He growled at me. His fists bunched up in my tank top.

“But we didn’t. I didn’t” I snarled back shoving him off of me.

“’Cause you were too chicken shit to do it alone” 

“Fuck you! You fucked up and left me you are a selfish asshole and nothing has changed. You are too much of a coward to admit it!” 

“Your right, I messed up, I left you when you needed me the most, and I'm sorry. I need you to be stronger than I was. Forgive me.” Merle whimpered like a dog. He had never seen so weak to me before. And I wasn’t quite sure I could forgive him or accept his apology so instead of having to show more feelings to these people I just walked away from him yet again and made my way back to my cell. I heard confident footsteps behind me they were defiantly not Merles’ he walked much more heavy footed but it couldn’t be a woman as it wasn’t the dainty way that they walked. It had to be Rick. Glenn was never confident and he defiantly wasn’t now, especially with Merle here, he was always on guard. And well hobbles has a different sound.

I flung myself at the springy mattress making sure to duck my head so I didn’t hit it off the top bunk. I felt the mattress dip as he sat next to me then it dipped more as he lay down his hand touching mine. I snatched my hand away as I got flashbacks of what we did. It was so squished on this mattress with two grown men on it. 

“Daryl...have I done something wrong?” He murmured his eyes looking really sad as he look down at me. I just breathed heavily in return, who would have thought even in a zombie apocalypse I still have relationship problems? Should I just stop worrying and caring and just let myself go full? I ran my rough hands over my face.

“We didn’t say anything.” I squeaked unmanly like. Fuck could I sound more like a love sick teenage girl. “You used me” I could hear his heart drop as those words came out of my mouth. 

“Daryl...I didn’t mean for you to see it that way” He squeezed my hand as he said that. I couldn’t deal with all of this touching and feelings. 

“Fuck Rick just leave me alone! Go and mourn your dead wife and be with your children” I bellowed at him, regretting it as soon as the words left my mouth and he looked like he was punched in the face. Maybe I was his way of mourning, a lot of widows and widowers use meaningless sex to help them get over it and maybe I should have let him use me so he didn’t go crazy like before...he is needed more. He stormed off unsurprisingly and quickly go in a conversation with Glenn about the Governor. 

“What did you do wrong to Officer Friendly; did you do a bad job sucking his cock?” Merle snarked as he let on the jail gate to my cell. I sprung off of the fucked up springy mattress and my fist hit Merle’s jaw with a horrible crack which I wasn’t sure if it was my hand or his jaw. Anger furrowed in his whole face mostly his eyebrows before he wacked his metal arm straight across my face.  
“You never change!” I spat at him as I crumbled into a blooded mess on the floor.   
“Apparently you do. You are now Officer Friendly’s bitch , you are weak because of them.” He screamed at me.   
“Fucking leave!”   
“You don’t deny it then” He laughed before he did leave, even left the building to wander around and probably kill some walkers. Rick really would be the death of me. 

I ended up on the roof after all the arguments I had, I needed to be away from everyone, the roof was the calmest even if it was raining and I could get ill. There’s a zombie apocalypse a cold isn’t the worst thing. With my eyes closed I was leant back on my elbows as I lay on the uncomfortable roof, thinking. Something I was never good at and always I had tried my best not to do and instead just acted on gut instinct or did what others told me to do. Who would have thought these events would bring the best out of me? Show me who I really am. Not the spineless coward Merle and my father forced me to be. 

When I was younger before things went to shit, Will wasn’t as abusive (still a fucking dick though) and mom smoked less and was drunk less even had a job yet it didn’t pay for much. I was five. Merle was eleven and it was less than a year before he went to juvenile and mom died. Merle going to juvenile screwed things up they expected him to fix up his attitude when he got older but he didn’t he got worse. They never had high hopes for anyone who lived in our neighbourhood but when I was younger I told my mother ‘one day I’m going to make you proud’ she just smiled, now that I’m older it’s so much harder to even think about how I even thought I could do that for them. I didn’t want to let them down, but they were the ones who let me down even Merle...especially Merle.   
The metal door slamming shut awoke me from my reminiscing, gentle footsteps moved towards me.  
“Why are we so human?”I laughed exasperated. My eyes still closed. Rain dripping onto my face and down my lips.  
“We are just doing what we can” Rick’s gruff voice murmured as he sat next to me his calf touching mine. Maybe he was right or maybe he HAD to keep believing that. 

“You understand that I was beaten and I can’t hide the marks as much as I try. I don’t trust people. I barely trust the group as much as I try to. I can’t.” My breathing was getting quicker and deeper. I had to take the leap of faith or else I’d never know. “Every time you touch me or are near me my heart beats faster than I have ever felt and I seem to unconsciously crave to be near you and my stomach does terrible things. I have NEVER felt this way before so I can’t deal with it. You don’t feel the same way I am sure but I had to tell you, that every time you touch me you leave a mark on me that never will leave and I don’t like to be vulnerable...but I bruise easily.” I had sat up half way through this emotional rant but I couldn’t look in his eyes. He was speechless.  
“Who doesn’t long for someone to hold ...who knows how to love you without being told?” I sighed before I jolted up on to my feet ready to walk away back into the dry before Rick’s hand grasped mine and pulled my on top of him in between his legs as his hands now moved to shape my face as he forced me to look into his eyes. 

“Sometimes love isn’t enough.” He said and I could feel my heart breaking. “It wasn’t with Lori, I loved her to pieces and Shane I loved him too in a different way, but it’s different with you, Daryl, I don’t just love you ... you are everything for me. I feel like you are in bloodstream.” Was the last word he spoke before his lips were on mine kissing me in such a gentle and loving way not like another other kiss I had ever had. 

“We can keep each other safe and sound.” 

 

That night after everyone else went to bed bar Maggie and Glenn who were on look out, Rick climbed into my bunk with me. 

Now that there was more consent I felt like I could take every single tingling detail in. His hands were very calloused due to guns and fighting but god they felt good upon me. They were strong broad hands, not afraid in their exploration but still gentle like he was afraid to hurt me. I think I startled him when I laughed and reached between his strong legs. Even through his pants I could feel his heat, his size made my body clench. I wanted him; I wanted his sweet smouldering heat and the way he looked at me like I was something precious. I rolled us over, straddling his waist and pressing my ass against his bulge. It felt delicious, especially when he arched up against me, voice deep with want. I was embarrassed by my lust filled actions but his bucking and moans tempted me to go further. The pulse in his neck sped up when I ran my tongue down it, nipping at his collar bone. Oh! He was sweetly sensitive when my palms rubbed quick circles over his nipples, groaning my name. His touches made me nearly dizzy with pleasure; he knew how to tease a man! Agile fingers teased down my sides as his tongue plunged into my mouth, teasing and scrapping everywhere they could reach. I cried out, uncaring of who heard me when those fingers left my sides and travelled to my hard aching nipples, swirling around teasingly before pinching sharply.   
As we struggled out of our clothes , I saw how achingly hard he was and it made me want to suck him off again but more than anything I wanted him in me. But the thought frightened me. I admit. And he's in me with slick fingers, and I'm writhing and moaning. Within my worrying I never noticed him sucking on his fingers. It was an uncomfortable sensation to begin with and I had my eyes clenched shut because there is nothing less embarrassing then having someone fingers inside one of your orifices. I wanted it to end to just get his cock inside of me or something. But he was being so gentle yet so through. Maybe because it was my first time. One, then two then after about two minutes he eased in a third. When he pulled out, I moaned in protest. Strangely. The way he looked at me afterwards half lidded eyes and that goofy smile it made me wanna run away again. He grabbed some type of lubricant and slathered it over his pulsating cock. 

 

He started to press into me, rocking in slow, shallow thrusts that gradually pressed deeper. I tried to rock back against him, pulling breath in sharp gasps as I stretched around him, at the sweet hot pain of penetration that crawled up my spine.  
At first his thrusts were shallow, testing the give of my muscles before I bit him. I drew blood on his shoulder before he thrust in earnest. I left so many marks on his pale skin, teeth marks all over his chest and shoulders; I clawed his back fairly bad as well. He left his share of marks on me. I have so many love bites everywhere he could reach and bruises in the shapes of fingers on my hips from where he held me, thrusting deep enough into me to steal my breath. 

It drove me wild, the feel of his fingers tight around my cock, stroking me as he drove into me, hot and hard and thick inside me. I was almost wailing before I knew it, crying out helplessly under him as he pulled me over the edge, shuddering under him and around him as I came in his fingers. His thrusts grew almost erratic, bucking hard into me as his hand shifted to clench at my hip, and his fingers dug in hard as he came, buried deep inside me, his breath in a throaty cry.  
The whole entire time I had a blush on my face up to my forehead and I would be lying if I said it didn’t hurt. But JC it felt fantastic! There wasn’t much speaking during or after, I put that down to he didn’t want to spook me, but he never left he pulled out of me ,wiped each other off with a damp cloth then we stayed tangled within each other. He had flipped me over so my head was on his chest and he wrapped his arms around me.   
“I love you” He whispered as we both dozed off to the most peaceful sleep we had both had. Ever.   
When I woke the next morning, I was a little surprised to find him still with me, his fingers stroking slow circles on my back, and I wondered how long he'd been awake like this. I pulled back to find him watching me, and he gave a soft smile. "Hey. How are you feeling?"

I just nodded dumbfounded that this actually had happened. And he was still here.   
The only thing that wrecked this perfect (a word I don’t use lightly) moment was my brother. What a surprise. He was stood in the door way to my cell/room jaw down to the floor. Anger furrowed in his brow.   
“What the fuck is this? You are his bitch!” He bellowed at me ready to pull me out of the bed if I said the wrong answer.   
“I love him, Merle. Get use to it” I mumbled uncertain of everything. He snickered.   
“If you or anyone else has a problem with this you are welcome to fucking leave” Rick ordered as he grip on me tightened. Merle rolled his eyes and just walked away, I think he was beginning to learn his place.   
“Good luck explaining that to the youngster” He grunted as he walked down the metal steps that clanged along the way. He had a point. Carl had not got over his mother’s death yet and he blamed his father. He kissed me on the forehead; I could feel him smiling against my skin.

Maybe it should just be a secret. A not very well kept secret. But a fucking breathtaking one.


End file.
